Turning 21...

Greetings!!

I turned 21 today. When i turn to look back at the 21 years i have already spent, i find those 21 years to be pure waste. Did i achieve something in life? Nothing that i can recount! Did i do anything in these 21 years that can be called worthwhile? The answer is again NO! Have i prepared something for the life hereafter? Though i knew everyone has to die someday, my actions were always in clear contradiction.

This is not just my story; it is the story of a large percentage of the present confused disoriented youth lacking a direction. Yes, everyone is told multiple times that they have to become doctors and engineers and accountants. What they are not told is how to become humans. They are not told things that are beneficial both in the present world and the hereafter. So when one day we stop and look back at our lives, we find nothing but ruins and wastage on our records.

Less than a month ago, during one of our classes at the university, we were posed a seemingly very innocent and easy question: Who am i? These 3 words, though individually worth nothing, in combination were more powerful even than the nuclear weapons! Who am i? Yes, i am a human, a daughter, a sister, a friend, a foe, a . . . . But who am I?! These are merely the spaces in God made relationships that i fill! Who am I? What is my identity? I was baffled!

Today when i look back at the 21 years of aisle i walked across, i find not a single thing i can be proud of, but numerous discrepancies i am ashamed of. I did not do anything worthwhile in this world, nor did i do anything that will benefit me in my after life. Who is to be blamed? I believe none except myself. I am lucky enough to be born among spiritually alive people who did their best to keep me in contact with the "REAL" world. I carelessly thought i had atleast 60 years of life to live before death attacks me. I thankfully faced the reality long before the time to regret came on me. But today i still do not have a single deed in my records that i can think of and say i did that right! Food for thought: how many of the readers can claim they have lived their lives well?

Peace.